Wouldn’t it be interesting to have the freedom of a child? Perhaps, though they learn more from us than we give them credit. I know that we are always warned to be careful what we do for children learn more from our actions than our words. In watching our daughter, I see this taking place with issues that never even popped into my head. Today’s meanderings deal with latest fads or dreams.
Our daughter pulled a jaw dropper a few weeks ago during her annual physical. The doctor was having a nice conversation with her when out of nowhere, our daughter announces that she was a vegetarian. The doctor stopped for a moment and asked how we were getting protein into her. I smile and asked our daughter what she wanted for dinner. “Panda Express Orange Chicken.” The doctor just nodded and smiled.
After a conversation in the car about what she likes to eat, she decided that she was a chickaterian. So for the last few weeks, we have been going on and off different versions of what she would be eating. If she truly wanted to be a vegetarian then we would work to allow her to discover if this is what she wanted. It has been hard to try to keep up with what version she would be from day-to-day. I really struggled on the day that she was a vegetarian who did not eat broccoli. Now we were getting a little too specific. However, no matter what her cause, when she would see dinner, no matter what was on the stove, she would ask for some of all and eat without worry. This morning may have brought an end to all of this talk. We had breakfast and while eating she once again decided that a vegetarian would be her new way. I promised not to make her anything that would go against this belief. I mentioned burgers, no problem, I mention turkey, OK, I mentioned lasagna, yup. I told her I would try not to make bacon anymore in the morning to tempt her. I could hear the brakes. “Bacon??” She is no longer speaking of changing eating habits.
The same changes take place in her in choice of what she wants to be when she grows up. For the longest time her dream is to be an artist who paints and takes photographs while traveling around the world to help people. I heard all of the details as to just how this would happen. What was really interesting is how no matter how she described her method of art, it always came around to being done to help the poor.
Through the years, we also heard that she was going to be an actor and dancer. Oh wait, we can’t leave out the singing and being a teacher. She loves dance and has been taking lessons for years. After her annual performance for the dance school, she is constant in her decision that the stage is for her. No matter the changes in careers it always came back to being an artist.
This week we had a game changer. She has decided that she will be opening her own restaurant, The Bakery Caf – no e. It would be a bakery, but also serve food for those who do not like sweets. She told us that she is still going to be an artist, but with food. At one point, she mentioned opening her doors to homeless so they could eat. I guess her choice of overall career hasn’t changed, just the methodology in which she would create. She came home today and started her first solo baking with pretzels. There were bumps and mistakes, but in the end, they were tasty.
So I started by saying wouldn’t it be nice to have the freedom of a child and then questioning whether they learn this from us. All too often adults make decisions as to the career and take the steps to make it happen. They work hard, they sweat, and they try. Unfortunately, many have chosen the wrong career and end up hating what they do for years, decades. People do not feel that they have that freedom. Adults are not allowed to say they made a mistake and correct it. Children have do not live thinking that what they chose today, they must be at 60. Please do not get me wrong. I am not advocating that people up and quit their jobs. However, they can take steps to make changes. It cannot happen overnight. It takes time, effort, and a want.
I also asked if children learn from us. While we may not change jobs all that often, although two years seems to be a number that holds for me, we do go out and buy the latest fads to only pass on them within months. We all have that piece of exercise equipment that makes a great clothes hanger. We buy the latest book on how to improve ourselves only to decide within a few months that we like who we are. We purchase the latest fad of clothing only to change when the next style comes out. Unfortunately, adults also teach children that it is okay to change their minds when things get a little tough such as in a relationship. Our children watch this and learn.
They learn that it is okay to change their minds. This is a wonderful thing as they start exploring who they will be when they become young adults. These are the things they should learn. What we should be cautious about is teaching them that it is okay to constantly change their minds in other areas when things get a little tough. Such a double edged sword. So yes, we are teaching our child that it is okay to change her mind on careers. We teach her it is okay to change whether she is a vegetarian or not. We teach her that these are the times for those things to happen. We also teach her that when she is older somethings are not fads and should not be changed on a whim. It is a difficult task to teach these things. Only time will tell if we do it right.
Thank you for meandering with me.